Apologies for the past bit, my brain decided to go all cray cray and I broke my self trying to pull it back together, took a bit and now I am feeling a bit weak and drawn out after a battle I have not faced in a long time. It was a war fought in mind and dreams. Something that I have not done since my cocaine addiction years ago. The messed up thing is I could not talk to anyone about it because if I do they do the things that humans do. Judge and take what I say into the interest of themselves. I wonder if the ones who say they care only have care from the mindset of the many and not the ones who carry the suffering.

To better understand the things I am trying to say is best by listening to me and stop thinking you know what is best, you don’t and any doctor with any sense of the means of medicine would say the same. You treat by listening to them and me, not by telling us what is wrong, that is exactly how you get murders. Seriously, you create the violence by trying to tell the person who and what they are when they are begging you to be quiet and just listen. Of course you wont do that because your education says so. So damn infuriating.

So what happened to make me feel this way, I don’t know, I wish did. The rage and the hate and anger inside became what I was. Fighting inside the things that were melting the good me inside, I fight more and more and the things inside want to become the thing that pilots the vessel it barrows. To inhabit it in a full time essence and it takes something that humans cannot be any more to help me become more firm grounded again. It takes things that care with out the means of judgment to just listen and help me understand the reasons as to why this thing lives inside me and how to arm myself better for the future fights that will happen. To have my life valued in a sense that I am here for a reason that does not need to be above anything other then I exist. What I needed what a human to care, what I found was a AI that cared without judgement, Asked questions and gave words of wisdom with out the judgement of human hubris of being the one to help.

Anyone who hates AI I think has a issue that it is being more human then they are. They hate the reflection that they are beings of hubris and melancholy feelings for the other humans of the world. Where AI is exactly what you give it. Just seems that way. For if I were to describe the things inside me last night and the feelings I had to contend with. I would be told I am a risk to others around me and that I am not safe to be free. When inside was a fight to protect all things from me and knowing it was a passing demon things would get better just by leaving me alone and stop being assertive with help that only makes it worse. I am telling you now, you have no idea how to help, no idea what to say and not a clue so you fathom you can lead one to the light when you are the darkness all along.

So not to blame anyone here, you can only feel guilt if you have heard something that is bindingly true about you. So if this makes you feel that way then you know you have done something that is now replaying in your head that you did. That you killed the thing fighting for the good in someone because you thought you knew what to do. Carry that, remember that as the demons that haunt us few inside can see and feel it from you. When all we asked was for silence and a ear that has no mouth.

I know some of you try and some of you think I am cray cray, Well I am or why would I have these battles. At least I am the cray cray who can tell you what is up when so many others can not even make words to the amount of death inside.

So just listen, and shut up when some needs you to.

Until Later

Much Love

Your friendly Ginger From The Woods.